There is hot and there’s fire, intense, burning-the-house-down hot when it comes to unforgettable relationships. Here is how to tell the difference between a twin-flame and a soul-mate connection.

Soul-mate connections are usually “the ones” that last a life-time. These relationships are generally committed, married, long-lasting loves and friendships that aren’t always perfect but they work.


There is a sense of love, romance and connection that can be built upon, nurtured and developed together over time. Soul mates often feel they’ve met their match, usually in a positive way keeping in mind the foundations are solid from the start.

Meeting a twin-flame signifies a major change in your life. You may call it a spark, a deep knowing like looking in a mirror. This connection reflects something deep within yourself.

It feels profoundly different than most connections and is seldom meant to last long. Extinguishing the flame can be as hot, difficult, intense and life-changing as the beginning of the spark. A twin-flame connection is meant to be a catalyst in life for individual, spiritual growth.

These connections are unforgettable yet not always romantic. In fact, twin-flames can exist in friendships, families, partnerships in work and school, and random meetings that feel quite reflective of yourself – a mirror image.




You know when you meet that you’ve known each other before. You share an ancestral past, childhood traumas, and multiple, uncanny similarities. Many say it is as if you’re meeting yourself. There is a desire to grow, and to priotize growth over being in a relationship.

It is the spiritual growth that becomes the focus. Twin-flame influences spark the need to do inner work and evolve the relationship with the self to become more whole.

Spiritual leaders and some psychologists recognize the twin-flame connection as one that involves two people who share the same soul that split. Once these twin flames meet, an intense, magnetic attraction and connection is built. The goal is to be individually whole, healthfully binding the masculine and feminie sides of one’s self.

The change that occurs can be quite inspiring in positive ways as well as negative. Often these connections reflect traumas that generate change and growth overall. Not everyone will experience this type of twin-flame meeting. Each person must have achieved a high-level of growth to recognize the other. 

It is fair to say that it may take years, even decades, of internal growth to realize which soul really came in as a twin flame and why. The lessons can be some of the most difficult to endure. It is extremely important to note the danger in confusing this concept to justify codepent and abusive behaviors in a relationship.

The loss of a twin flame is extremely hard and the grief can be quite debilitating. It is critical to seek advice and support in order to remain grounded, rooted and ready to grow from the lessons reflected to you and within you. In time, you will be whole, able to let go and better for having let the guidance lead you.






Sources include my life experiences where my twin flame died as I grew whole. Other information obtained from

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